No more drama.
That was my thought when I first laid eyes on my 2012 diary in the store. I had been looking for the right one for a while, and almost missed it, hidden from view on the bottom shelf. The color wasn’t exactly an eye-catcher either. But it was surprisingly right.
If you have followed my stories from the start, you know that I’ve made a habit of choosing a diary of a color that will set the tone for my year to come. Two years ago, I chose red, and embarked on a risky, passionate and exciting journey (read the color of 2010). For 2011, I decided to go with shocking pink. Still hot, bright and daring. But more fun and less masochistic (read the color of 2011). That plan didn’t work out quite the way I wanted.
My “dark passenger” from the past has come back to weigh me down, in spite of it all. Professionally, physically and socially, 2011 has been a successful year. My business has taken off. I have fallen in love with yoga and managed to find a running regime that doesn’t tear a hole in my lung (8 months and counting…knock on wood). I have thoroughly enjoyed new and old friendships. Emotionally, however, it’s been tough. Anxiety attacks are back, and I have found myself, once again, falling into those deep black holes where neither joy nor hope exists. This backlash has to be stopped before it gets worse. I can do it. I will do it.
Which brings me back to that special color. I had been thinking I wanted to stick with pink or go back to red. Mainly for the sake of love, the mystery that still eludes me. So I was surprised, even a bit disappointed, to find myself falling for…well, beige. Or sand, latte, tan; whatever you prefer to call this:
Anyway, this is it. The color of 2012 is beige. A soothing and permissive non-color for my rebellious pink mind and passionate red heart to land on. Beige like the beaches in Kerala where I will be spending the last two weeks of February.
Beige for no more drama.