The color of 2015.

Color? 2015? I don’t know. My planning calendar is in my phone these days.
I have no brightly colored leather-and-paper diary to show me the way.

But it’s not my “digital life” that’s made me lose my direction. It’s my “happy life”. The better my life gets, the less I need to change it. There is less pain, less struggling, less urgency. But there is also less of an obvious direction. Before, I always wanted to move upwards. Now, it’s more like “should I go right or left or straight ahead? Or just stop for a while to smell the flowers?”

Now that I no longer NEED to change my life, I can use my time and energy to enjoy it. Not that I would ever lean back and stop moving. But I don’t have to paddle like crazy to stop myself from sinking. Rather than mending what keeps falling apart, I can build new things.

Back to 2015! What shall I build?

My home. Keep the momentum going! Hire that painter to fix the ceiling. Hire that repairman to fix the window blinds. My apartment already feels more like Home than ever before, and I’m not aiming for showroom perfection, but these things are at the top of my 2015 to-do list.

My body. Keep it up! Last year’s training and eating have given me a good foundation. I can feel it. I still enjoy my sweets and salties, and I’m still struggling with my core strength. But I’m getting stronger and healthier, despite my age, and I’m looking forward to this year’s races: 80K in April, 50K in June, and 90K in August.

My soul. Stay true to myself! Too much ITF* socializing makes me tired and unhappy. So keep declining event invitations and embracing alone-time! It’s working. However, while I need to be economic with my time, I can be generous with money, and donate to causes that I believe in. I can also be generous with love. Keep heart and mind open, see the good in people, smile and look people in the eyes, show appreciation, give a helping hand. Don’t hate. Don’t put people down. Don’t hold a grudge, and don’t pass it on to others. Apologize.

What about that other kind of love? Finding it has been on my wish list (to-do list?) for some time now. And I did try online dating in 2014. But it’s SO boring. Why can’t my friends just set me up with someone perfect? (Hint!) Whether I find him, or don’t find him, I will always be the love of my life.

And what about color? Let’s say the colors of 2015 are black, grey and navy blue. My favorite colors. Then maybe 2015 will be my favorite year. So far.

* ITF = in the flesh

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